What is your motive?

A wise woman, whom I consider one of my life's best mentors, gave me not an answer, rather I question I always ponder:  "What is their motive?"
Perhaps you need to ponder if the people in your life are for you or against you.  Sometimes it's hard to discern either way, but if you sense adversity, which can impact the peace in your life, making it rather difficult to live, love and laugh your way through the day, you  must make changes in the choices you make in how you live your life, and whom you allow in your inner circle of trust.   Remember - TRUST IS EARNED!

Co-dependency will make it difficult for you to make changes as you feel you need to be the stabilizer and not 'rock the boat' when you're involved in difficult, trying and even abusive relationships.  Only you can change the negativity in your life.  Our attitudes are truly the only thing we can control, but don't try staying positive in a negative situation. Be positive that you can make the needed changes, and dash out of Dodge before your life is tainted with a stench of stink from those who might be taking advantage of you.

Don't view questioning the motives of others to be cynical, distrusting or fault-finding.  It's okay to look out for your best interests as you learn to protect yourself from those whose intent is to harm you. 

The following quote by Vera Nazarian holds much truth about unconditional love: "Love -- not dim and blind but so far-seeing that it can glimpse around corners, around bends and twists and illusion; instead of overlooking faults - love sees through them to the secret inside."

Those who hurt others are wounded themselves.  It's hard to give grace and mercy to people whose wounds are hidden, and wounds can't turn to scars if issues such as incest, physical, mental and emotional abuse, abandonment, betrayal, and the sick-lical cycle of continued trauma is not dealt with. Journeys don't change when new paths are not taken.  Overcoming our woundedness is challenging, but it's a choice you must make in order for your wounds to scar.  There's nothing wrong when your life has scars - as scars are proof your wounds are healed!!

You can't fix others, only yourself.  Those who hurt and harm do so out of jealousy, envy, anger, unforgiveness and feeling powerless.  Those who bully or try to become powerful over others will never fill the empty void deep down inside their troubled souls or broken hearts.

"To thine own self be true" is more than a nice sentiment - it's a way of life. . .and in the wise words of Maya Angelou - "When you know better you do better." Trust your gut, and don't allow yourself to be torn down by others. . .your life's purpose will never be complete if you do!